Please Excuse Me For a Moment.

Often I have the urge to write. It’s where I go when I don’t want to go anywhere else. Often I sit down just like I am now with no direction; mind racing in thirty-two directions, my thoughts crashing into imaginary walls as I watch from afar and judge their motives. Full moon tendencies are on a high tonight in my veins. I can see the full moon across the room through the window, six floors above the late night streets of downtown Toronto. Oh hey, werewolves. I just blanked. So I opened pinterest and the first quote I saw (no joke) was this… “To make the right choices in life you have to get in touch with your soul. To do this, you need to experience solitude, which most people are afraid of because in the silence you hear the truth and know the solutions.” Shh. I’m not afraid of that. I crave the challenge or the truth. What about you? And why did I see that right now…

Now what… dot dot dot…

You know what is refreshing? Reading the true tales of humans. The icky parts. The imperfect race through it all. Just lay it on the line. Because you feel so called ‘normal’. Being in the new age social media scene eats at me sometimes. (How’s that for true tales…) I adore it. I adore the sharing and creativity and artistry of it. I adore seeing the highs of fellow acquaintances and strangers. I enjoy cheering them on from my smartphone. I also adore being raw. Being real. Blurred lines. I enjoy truth.

And so I leave this raw, blurry note with not much direction or purpose but I leave on a high because I have an outlet to be real (with possible judgement) and I’m okay with that. Risk is an addiction. I hope you trust that you’re wonderful enough, no blurred lines, to do the same. -k

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“Don’t let someone dim your light simply because it’s shining in their eyes.”

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Frozen Movements.

What do you do when you feel you’re due for a little bit of too good to be true? Does it push you forward or push you away? Does it fuck with your freedom?

I had a couple of comfort convos today about just that. Finding the freedom and hidden fabulous of tough times. There’s a glow of greatness in absolutely everything that falls at your feet or in front of your face. I do believe that. Even when it shakes up your sensitive soul. I also believe that it takes the continuation of life’s great dance to make believing it a habit as oppose to just head filled hopes. Time is a blessing. And the transitions that two-step there way into your life are a blessing.

I’ve really rambled about life alot lately. Sometimes I don’t even know if my rants make sense but they make sense to me. Four years ago I felt one of those transitions. At the time I had been frozen for years. Life offered me it’s hand and said dance with me a new way. I didn’t expect to continue experiencing the transitions as much as I have but I almost get high off of them. Maybe I look for them and that’s why I notice them. I can’t wait for them, even when they’re challenging, because they’ve only brought me freedom. And I full out love a good challenge. Even if it took a minute or a day or months for the transition to mold me and make me realize why it spun me to the right. Because it was right. And I was left to be better. I challenge you to accept them in all forms. -k

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‘Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere and sometimes in the middle of nowhere you find yourself.’

City love.

I’ve got a bad case of fernweh. The wanderlust bug. I get antsy when I receive an email from Westjet and when I realize that I have three ‘days off’ in a row. I love watching the airport landscape fill with ever changing, beautiful people and writing about ‘what ifs’ and ‘one day’s’ in my journal on the plane. I hate packing. Trail mix, a new playlist, my latest brain food novel and the largest cup of coffee possible accompany me to aisle 33, window seat. But when the recognizable building tops and light patterns of my city come into view just before landing there is always that simple peace of the familiar. It’ll always be good to be home. -k

Thank you, Art.

Art let’s me escape, whether it be between sports scripts or daily doses of the unexpected. Those moments that you don’t foreshadow when your head leaves your peaceful pillow post sweet dreams. And yet all those moments are realistically art. Because there is art in everything.

And everyday it seems that sometime around midnight is when I usually grab Art’s hand and we dance or sing or write lyrical nonsense. That is when I feel the most confident. The most relaxed. It’s when the words ‘I don’t give a shit’ hold the most truth. I’m thankful to have found him. I’m thankful that my Art is accepted by my family and peers and strangers. I’m the most thankful that he always let’s me be me.

And tonight between sports scripts I filled other windows on my desktop with Art and his tales. And then he showed me this and it was the perfect goodnight. So, goodnight. -k